Paul Kirkley’s review of Cinderella panto at the Cambridge Arts Theatre: The cast are having a ball – and you will too
A Cambridge Arts Theatre pantomime without Matt Crosby playing dame? It seems unthinkable, but this year the city’s much-loved panto legend has cast off the bustle and fake boobs in favour of playing Buttons, devoted friend to Cinderella, in a lavish, funny and heartwarming new tilt at the classic fairytale.
Crosby’s dames have been so integral to the success of recent Arts productions, it takes a while to adjust to the absence, but his performance as Buttons is full of cheeky charm – and it’s right and proper he should stay on the side of the angels (and the audience), as opposed to playing one of the boo-hiss ‘wicked stepsisters’. (You can’t call them ugly any more, it seems – even though the script repeatedly makes clear they’re no oil paintings.)
As the dreadful duo – wittily named Tess and Claudia – Harry Howle and Steven Roberts bring a touch of Drag Race slay queen sass to the party, boasting of having a “Brat winter” and warning each other “not to go all Baby Reindeer” on Prince Charming.
Chloe Gentles, in the title role, finds the perfect balance of sweet and sparky: no longer the simperingly passive creature of old, this Cinders is a natural sciences student with a passion for conservation and a ready wit. Stuart Simons brings an easy charm to the somewhat thankless role of Baron Hardup, while Julia J Nagle plays Fairy Goodheart as a twinkly mix of Hyacinth Bucket and Dame Edna.
The traditional principal boy roles of Prince Charming and Dandini have been recast with actual boys, leading to a distinct absence of thigh slapping – and, indeed, women – among the main cast. Maybe the tradition finally got too confusing for the kids? (Although you’d imagine the genderfluid generation wouldn’t bat an eyelid.) Fortunately, both actors are terrific: as the prince, Jack Wilcox is proper triple threat material, moving seamlessly from a tap solo to a rapturously received performance of Never Enough, from The Greatest Showman. (He’s got the matinee idol looks, too, which doesn’t seem entirely fair.) Alex Bloomer, as his faithful manservant, does a good line in comic exasperation, while dropping the occasional wistful hint that his fealty arises from more than mere duty.
In this re-telling, the Baron is actually Master of Hardup College, Cambridge – a somewhat crumbling institution struggling with the cost of living crisis – continuing the recent tradition of setting all Arts Theatre pantos within Cambridge itself, complete with beautiful painted backcloths of King’s College, Trinity Great Court, etc. I suppose that’s one of the advantages of living in what is, architecturally speaking, already a fairytale city. (No offence, but I’m not sure it would have the same effect in, say, Stoke.)
It's also a great excuse for writer Al Lockhart-Morley to cram in loads of local gags, including the now traditional pop at Cambridge United, and a frankly shameless one about boat race crews dunking their cox in the river. (The stepsisters are also delighted to have been “papped in the Cambridge Independent”. You’re welcome, ladies.)
Contemporary references abound – you might need your kids to explain the exact meaning of ‘rizz’ and Skibidi Toilet – but Cinderella is also the pantomime with the most unironically romantic fairytale charm, and the production fully leans into that, ensuring there’s as much magic as mischief. No spoilers, but the transformation of the pumpkin into a horse-drawn carriage is a dazzling piece of stagecraft, while the beautifully choreographed Trinity Ball is pure Bridgerton. And all the fourth wall-breaking LOLs don’t stop the kids from being fully invested in the story, as evidenced by the audible gasps when the wicked sisters ripped apart poor Cinders’ ballgown.
Fourth walls aren’t the only thing in danger of being broken in the traditional ‘slop scene’, and this year’s – set in a dog grooming parlour disguised as a beauty spa – is an all-time great: a delirious slapstick riot of gunk, wardrobe malfunctions and more pratfalls than a WWE smackdown. (It’s little wonder Crosby joked about “laughing all the way to A&E.”)
This being 2024, it’s obviously no longer acceptable for a smart, independent woman like Cinderella simply to marry the handsome prince and live happily ever after, so in this version she also accepts an offer to study at Harvard, with the prince tagging along as her plus one. GB News viewers would no doubt huff and puff at such wokery, but it feels like the right decision to me.
It’s still not a fairytale ending for poor Buttons, though, who can’t compete in Cinderella’s affections with a rich prince, no matter how progressive her politics. But it’s a neat trick to undercut the sadness by having him break out into a defiant rendition of I Will Survive.
With a sparkling script, witty direction from Michael Gattrell, canny song choices (I never thought I’d hear Thin Lizzy in a panto) and assured performances from the whole cast – including the dancers and the adorable young ensemble – Cinderella is the latest in a long line of festive triumphs for the Arts. After the curtain comes down on the final performance, the theatre is “going dark” (dahling) for a major refurbishment. But it will be open again in time for next year’s panto. Which is a relief, as Christmas simply wouldn’t be Christmas without it.
Cinderella is at Cambridge Arts Theatre until 5 January.
Visit cambridgeartstheatre.com for tickets.
